Some Eulogies Crafted and Created

Following are three eulogies written by Jacqui Chaplin after interviewing family members, and in the case of Amy Black, the woman herself – three days before she died.

Joseph Inverness – A man of strong opinions, of artifice and honesty.

Paul Barrett – The ‘second chapter’ of his life.

Amy Black – A 53 year old whose end of life experience was exactly as she wanted it to be.

a table of wonderful memories of a man who lived a wonderful long lifeJoseph Inverness

A man of strong opinions, of artifice and honesty. He was at times mercurial and always compassionate. Joseph Inverness, by so many accounts, was a man of great integrity. To his children he was: a friend, a hero, a character, a role model. He was known for his strength, honour and love. He was passionate and interesting. When asked about his humour, his appreciation of wit and whether he valued it in life, Adele and Kathy, as one, exclaimed. “God, yes!”

Of Adele and Joseph’s love for one another: their children expressed the adoration which Joseph had for Adele. Expressed in so many ways… he bought her jewellery and would take an earring, or some other small keepsake, of hers with him as a talisman on important days. He would tell complete strangers that Adele was the most beautiful woman in the world. That he could chat to people from all walks of life comfortably, in the most diverse of places just made his declarations of love for Adele all the more frequent. He paid careful attention to her interests and gifted her an exquisite paint set. Adele dived in and immersed herself in painting and gave vent to her creativity. Although he was known to pop his head into her painting room and make an observation or two about something lacking in her current artwork. With a wry smile, Adele mentioned Joseph was never able to tell her just how to fix the problem…

For Adele, her Joseph was the most wonderful man. Hearing her express her love for Joseph left you in no doubt as to the sincerity of her words.

Joseph and Adele’s children have put together their favourite-est of, oh so many, favourite memories and stories about their Dad. So too, have some of Joseph’s grandchildren. Before we hear those it’s my privilege to fill you in on some of the finer points and memories that are related to Adele and Joseph’s life and a few of his not yet named passions and loves – in addition to his adoration of Adele.

So, here goes…

Believe it or not, especially if you have only known Joseph and Adele as a couple, once upon a time, one Joseph Inverness was a confirmed bachelor, who loved riding his motorbike around Melbourne. If you were at Joseph’s 80th you’ll have heard him recollect his thoughts about himself ‘back then’. If you weren’t there, ask Adele or one of the kids about that!

As fortune, would have it, Joseph and Adele found themselves working at the Navy office at the StKilda Road Barracks in the early fifties. Joseph’s first sighting of Adele, according to his own account, occurred from a distance. When he clapped eyes on Adele, he was heard to say (and pardon the language – but I quote directly) “Oh, sheeeeeeeet!” – and //he was a goner!  No more confirmed bachelor-hood for Joseph!

Contriving some excuse – as he would do many a time over the following weeks – Joseph walked into Adele’s office. Her first sighting of him? What she remembers was that each of the buttons on his shirt was sewn on with a different colour rod binding silk: one red, one green, one yellow. She thought to herself that this was a man who needed looking after. Standing at a tram stop on the way home one night Joseph finally plucked up the courage to ask Adele out on a date. With an affirmative response received, clearly in paroxysms of joy and delight, Joseph got on the next tram. Adele noted that it was not even his tram! Ah the joys of young love!

With a sparkle in her eye, Adele told me that Joseph spun her a story of their potential 63 years ago and she swallowed it hook line and sinker, with immense joy.

Joseph and Adele married on November 8th, 1953 at St Paul’s Anglican Church in Caulfield North. Joseph loved to go back there and visit – a true romantic. Adele, not so much. Kathy drove Joseph and Adele by the Church not too long ago for a bit of reminiscing.

Joseph would always have been travelling in his later years given the chance. One of his greatest travel-related pleasures was the moment that he first placed his feet on Scottish soil. A pleasure derived from his family heritage based in Inverness, the Gateway to the Highlands. He loved to travel with Adele – who was not so enamoured with travel herself. They did several overseas trips together. Three trips to New Zealand. And three sojourns about Australia.

In recent times, each year saw Joseph spending two to four weeks in hospital with various heart/lung challenges. His final admission was to Melbourne Hospital, where pneumonia set in on top of his other health challenges. Joseph was moved to palliative care at Suburban Health and persevered with life longer than expected.

The Inverness’s wish to praise and thank the beautiful staff who looked after Joseph, and the family, while he was at Melbourne Hospital. They are also incredibly appreciative of the care and compassion of all the metaphorical angels at Suburban Health. The Inverness family could not speak highly enough of their wonderful and nurturing attention.

a double-ended floral sheath who loved his roses

Paul Barrett

I had quite the chat with the lovely Dorothy on Saturday. Boy, did our exchange take some interesting turns down some curious conversational alleys and lanes. It has been my privilege to compile Dorothy’s recollections about her life with Paul from that conversation. And my honour to share her tribute to Paul with you now.

Paul and Dorothy met at a very sad time in both their lives: originally meeting through a widow/widower association. One auspicious day a lift to an event fell through for Dorothy. An alternative lift was arranged. Although Dorothy was reluctant to have an unknown man collect her, she accepted the offer. And so began a wonderful friendship which would morph into a loving partnership spAliceing more than three decades.

Dorothy felt that she and Paul clicked right away. She recalled Paul as being a very nice man. A man with no airs and graces, a man who was straight forward.

Dorothy shared with me, her understanding of, how much Paul loved his wife Betty, the mother of his children. How Betty’s passing totally devastated Paul. So much so that Paul had confided in Dorothy about just how difficult he felt life was without Betty. Dorothy, so aware of the loss that Paul and his boys had experienced, was there to support Paul, to help him come through his terrible loss. And so it was that Paul and Dorothy’s special partnership continued to grow.

Seeing each other every night in their earlier days, yet still living separately, Paul put a suggestion on the table. His proposed that he put his bed in the back room of her home to test how they would go living together. Dorothy liked the way they lived together… it was so easy to get along with Paul. She told me she always felt comfortable with him. As it turns out the couple were incredibly compatible. What a fine suggestion Paul had made! I wonder if Paul knew before Dorothy that they would be great together. Dorothy certainly seemed to feel the same way pretty early on too!

Some of you may not know this about Paul – but he had always wanted to be a chef. When Paul and Dorothy started sharing a life together Paul took great delight in cooking for them. Seafood and strong tea were favourites of Paul’s.

A love of food and fine dining was something that Paul and Dorothy also shared. In their long past days together in Melbourne they loved going to their city’s many fine dining establishments and experiencing the gourmet delights on offer. Whenever a new restaurant opened – to much acclaim – Paul and Dorothy would make sure to eat there. When at times they exhausted the current batch of new eating establishments, they turned their adventures to theatre dining at venues like the Tivoli. It was at the Tivoli that Dorothy’s favourite photo of Paul was taKeith. It is one that Dorothy truly treasures and wanted to have here today for you to remember what a handsome man Paul was – in addition to all the other wonderful aspects of the man Dorothy so loved.

The couple, upon deciding that they were great together, determined to make some changes. And those adjustments included house transitions and travelling.

And talk about a couple of travellers. More than a decade and a half ago, Dorothy mentioned to Paul that she would love to see “Paris in Spring time.” And, there and then, Paul declared his commitment to ensure that his lovely Dorothy would have her wish come true. And it did!

Dorothy is the owner of a wonderful collection of souvenirs and photos from the travels she shared with Paul. They travelled between country towns around England –  visiting the likes of Devon and Cornwall. They’ve been to Hawaii and the Greek Islands. A trip to Las Vegas saw Paul and Dorothy enjoy Tom Jones live in concert.  Dorothy recounted the many amazing sites they saw in one particular casino. A dazzling line up of real people and most amazingly, an array of statues that could move very realistically – based on Dorothy’s wide eyed description… A trip to Rome together saw them outside the Colosseum one day watching some local Romans dressed as Centurions – a scene which drew them back into the times of Ancient Rome… ahhhh… only to have a cyclist ride through the middle of the centurions and totally shatter the illusion.

In each other, Paul and Dorothy both experienced a second chance at a wonderful life and deep love together. Paul told Dorothy in his final weeks that he had no regrets. He’d lived a life he enjoyed with all his heart.

When asked about how she wanted to experience this service for Paul, Dorothy told me she wanted a respectful service: one that would honour and commemorate Paul’s life –  and her life with him. With great sadness, she liKeithed this time in her life, to reaching the end of a wonderful, long and well-crafted novel. The kind that you just don’t ever want to end. But, so sadly for Dorothy, the last page of the final chapter of Paul’s story has been turned. So too, the last page in the Paul and Dorothy story. It is one Dorothy is sorrow-filled to have finished… even though both she and Paul often wondered just how they got to be in their eighties together.

So, this is a time of mourning for Dorothy, who so deeply misses her Paul. And it is also an opportunity to remember fondly the experiences, the adventures, the loves and the second chances that Paul has had in his life, in addition to the wonderful opening chapters he lived through.

According to Dorothy, Paul liked to go to bed early. I asked whether that meant he was up with the sparrows. “No”, she replied, she would wake him each morning. The day before his actual birthday last year, his 88th, he’d been out celebrating his birthday with Dorothy and some friends at York on Lilydale. They’d had a lovely day. It was the morning after these celebrations last September that Dorothy had a particularly difficult time rousing Paul. He was to spend the next three months in and out of hospital until an old injury caused his pain to move into the realms of the unbearable.

On the night before he died, Dorothy, unable to get into the hospital to see Paul, due to some personal health challenges of her own. She wanted so badly to speak with him but she knew he was no longer capable of talking on the phone. Daughter-in-law, Jenny encouraged Dorothy to telephone him. She wondered if it would be worth it. One of the nurses let her know to speak up nice and loud so Paul could hear her. Dorothy told her beloved partner of 32 years that it was ok to let go, it was time to be free of the pain that had been plaguing him.

Although so very sad at the passing of her Paul, Dorothy is relieved that he is no longer suffering.

And so ends the final page in the last chapter in the story of Paul Barrett’s life.

Amy Black

funeral flowers, lillies, classic white floral tribute,

Amy Martine was born on May 15, 1964. The youngest of four children to Keith and Alice Jones. Youngest sister to Lily, Greg and Tina. Wife to Keith. Step-mum to Craig and Bridget. Long loved sister-in law to George, Bill, Dean, Danni and Samuel and Trisha.

Daughter, sister, niece, cousin, aunt, wife, step mum and so much more.

There was no disputing in Amy’s mind that she had the best childhood. Gathering her immediate family together for her final farewell was so important to her. This story is a tribute to the wonders of her youth, her cousins as her first friends, the total admiration she holds for her parents Keith and Alice as individuals and as a team.

This is a time for fond remembrance, of expressions of gratitude for the role each of you has played in making Amy’s childhood so exquisitely memorable for all the right reasons.

Amy shared the following stories, while surrounded by her family on the Saturday before she died. These are her memories, the telling of them an important part of her acceptance of the finality of her situation – facing the reality of the imminent probability of her death. It was a time of gently shared memories:    growing up in Cole Street; laughter at childhood memories, stories of family holidays at Rye and finding out about the time Amy really hit her conversational straps!

The family home lovingly created by Keith and Alice in Cole Street, Gardenvale was filled with warm and vibrant memories. Amy reflected on the challenge that her Mum had trying to keep four kids quiet while Keith, home from night or late shifts would need to sleep while the kids were all too awake.  This was made so much easier as the family lived next door to Keith’s childhood home. The kids had their grandparents next door. All it took was a walk through the gate and the kids could be found endlessly hitting tennis balls against the wall of their grandparents’ home. No doubt driving them to mild distraction. Alice whilst keeping the home fires burning was also known for working two jobs at time!

With great glee her sisters joined Amy’s recollection of afternoon adventures at home on moon balls bounding up and down the back yard holding on fiercely to the handles in an attempt to remain balanced! And the indoor pursuits included practicing the latest music, in front of the lounge room mirror, hairbrushes in hand.

Another benefit of family life, so appreciated by Amy, was the proximity of their family home being a literal stone’s throw from Elsternwick Park, that is if you can throw a stone from your front yard, across the road! The walk to school crossed the park and the kids would head up Cochrane Street to Elsternwick Primary School.

If you can believe it, there was a time, when Amy was not the chatty, vivacious conversationalist you know her to be. Up until the age of four, Amy was a quiet child, not speaking much at all. But this did not last! As was the way in the late ‘60s, Amy was left alone in hospital to have her tonsils removed. No sooner had Alice arrived to pick up her youngest, than the conversation began: “Mum, why did you leave me alone?  I didn’t like it!”  And so it began and it has never stopped! As was witnessed in the three hour conversation Amy had to share her story!

Christmas Day was seen as the official start of the family’s summer holidays. Recalling the closed glass doors on Christmas morning the Jones kids, with foreheads on glass and using their hands to block unhelpful reflections would seek to pre-empt the unwrapping of presents by guessing what Santa might have brought. Thwarted by Santa – or maybe their parents – it was Keith and Alice’s allocated space in the present room that was closest to the glass doors. The kids would strain their eyes and crane their heads sharing their predications of what might be inside those doors that were tied shut. There was never a thought to cut the ties, open the doors and sneak in for a look… it was part of the excitement of the morning to anticipate what might be coming their way. Assessments of the size of the various piles of presents would be made – often before even realizing that the biggest surprises were out in the backyard.

Post present opening at home, visits to grandparents next door as well as to see Keith and Alice’s extended family were part and parcel of the Christmas ritual. Visits to Grandma, Alice’s Mum were shared with aunts, uncles and cousins. Those cousins, were affectionately acknowledged by Amy as her first friends. Games such as Murder in the Dark were learnt and played with cousins first.

Arriving at Grandma’s the kids would jump out of the family car, arms loaded with presents and file into Grandma’s adding their presents to the ever-growing pile underneath the Christmas Tree. A stand out feature of Christmas at Grandma’s was her unique and somewhat minimalist Christmas Tree. A bare branch, albeit a fairly large one, painted white and adorned with Christmas trimmings was a constant throughout Amy’s family childhood. These were exciting times for Amy and the foundation of a life in which the presence of her family was treasured, valued and highly prized.

With the Christmas family visits over it was time to head off to Rye for six weeks of summer beach bliss.

The car trip had a ritual of its own… Heading around the bay to Rye the first person to spot the water had to sing out loud, “By the sea, by the sea! The beautiful sea.” It was a greatly prized honour to be the one who saw the sea first!

On arrival, the tent would be set up and Keith, always well prepared, would set to the task of digging the trenches around the tent, so that in the event of the eventual rain that would come sometime over the next six weeks, he would not be out there in the mud and rain trying to stop the family tent from flooding. He was all too often stirred about digging trenches in the sunshine but could sit back and relax, dry as toast, when it rained.

Amy, referred to herself as “the blob” when recounting the time she would spend wallowing from morning to night in the shallow waters at the Rye front beach, watched over by one of her siblings and more often by her Mum – who got to enjoy some time with friends while keeping an eye out on her youngest! She was quite the water baby. As Amy got older, in her braver moments, she would head over to the patches of seaweed to test her mettle in the strange tangle of brown, slippery water weeds!

Up on the White Cliffs the kids would explore the bush and play chasey to their hearts’ content. Every last inch of those cliff tops was known by the Jones kids. Just as the Jones’s were regulars at Rye – so were many other families.  Friendships were made each Summer only to be rekindled year after year.  The foreshore is where the kids learnt to play cards, a past time Amy took with her into adult life.

Amy spoke with deep feelings of gratitude and admiration for her parents and the life they provided her. She credits Keith and Alice for the resilience they instilled in her! The ability to self-reflect and when things weren’t going her way to ask herself the question: “What could I be doing differently?” That resilience was clearly evident in the Amy that I met. And no doubt you have seen it in Amy throughout her life as well as by the truck load over the last ten months.

Many of you would know that a pianola graced the family home… Just like a piano but special – the pianola could be loaded with rolls of music which informed which piano notes and keys would be played. In order to get the rolls moving one had to pump the pedals. You could put the proverbial pedal to the metal and see how a beautiful romantic show tune could be played in what could be described as the equivalent of talking with a lung full of helium. It could get quite a laugh! Sunday nights around the pianola would see Keith and Alice’s taste in music shared with their children.  They loved the show tunes… Oklahoma, The King & I, Desert Song, and South Pacific. Everyone would gather round – including the aunts, uncles and cousins and they’d sing the show tune classics. It’s where the kids learnt to sing and harmonise. Keith’s parents had owned the pianola before Amy’s family and so the tradition was passed to a third generation of Joneses.

Amy was tremendously appreciative and grateful for the presence of her family and the contribution the made to every element of her early years and the richness it brought to her life. In her words: She is eternally grateful.

A particular focus of Amy’s gratitude was expressed for her Mum, Alice. Who at 82, even though she doesn’t look a day over 25, looked after Amy during her illness like a woman of much younger years. It cannot be understated how much of a rock that Amy felt her Mum was for her over the last year. Alice would spend endless hours sitting in hospital with Amy. She never got frustrated and was always good company.

Dad, Keith is also admired by Amy. She recognised that, maybe some of her stubbornness might have come from her beloved Dad! Although Keith could apparently go on about politics until Amy would zone out, she was always in awe of his amazing thirst for knowledge. She recognised the great contribution her Dad made to the community in which he lived. And then there were his jokes. It didn’t matter that they were classic “Dad jokes” … What mattered is the place they came from. Keith likes to make people laugh, to bring a smile to people’s faces. And one thing that Amy had learnt was that not everyone has that same generosity of spirit as her Dad.

Lily is admired by Amy for the strength she showed with her MS challenges. And Amy always enjoyed partying and holidaying with George and Lily over many decades. At the age of ten the name “Bucky Beaver” was bestowed on Amy by brother-in-law, George and in quick succession Greg  was renamed “Pinocchio”. After that initial exchange George and Amy shared a special bond. They had a great understanding and hit it off from the get go! George, by Amy’s own account, was a top friend as well as a top brother-in-law!

Next up is Tina, Amy’s ‘little’ older sister. They had a lot of fun as children, playing together. And her unceasing, unflagging support of Amy during her illness was so appreciated.

Amy has always treasured Bill since the first day he offered to take her to Ollie’s Trollies for an ice-cream. Back then he never referred to Amy by name and always called her “Stretch” as a teenager. She loved him and loved having him as a brother-in-law.

Greg , was the idol of his youngest sister’s life. While her friends were into the Bay City Rollers she was into whatever Greg liked – so it was Led Zeppelin for Amy. He was generous with his Chinese burns like only a brother can be and was known for his unceasing attempts to remove loose teeth from his sisters’ mouths with a piece of string tied between their teeth and his bike. Despite never being successful at dislodging his sisters’ teeth he did manage to pull one of his – not supposed to be pulled out teeth from his own mouth!… like only a boy could!

Amy feels blessed with the life that was hers – even in the face of her ‘crappy’ illness. Her Mum and Dad, sisters and their partners have been so wonderfully supportive and loving through her illness.

And then there is Keith Black. Amy’s big, bad handsome man!

In life, said Amy, we are fortunate to find new families to add to our existing families. And that is how she felt about Keith and his family.

Keith first remembers seeing Amy back in the mid-eighties at the Elsternwick Park Tennis Club. Keith was at the Club, digging trenches for new lights to be installed when he “noticed” Amy. But it was to be years later before their real connection began.

Playing their first game of Mixed Doubles together they won 6-5. Amy thought that it would not be long before Keith, a much better tennis play would move to a higher grade. But it seemed that Keith was more than happy to be socialising and playing with Amy’s group of tennis compadres. Keith was spoken for at the time and Amy recalled thinking to herself, much to her chagrin, that “all the good ones were gone!”

Amy, having had enough of life and its challenges in Melbourne, separating from her first husband and nursing her lifelong friend Joe Fraser  through to his death, decided it was time to get some sand between her toes. Thanks to a wise man, she had the opportunity to move initially to the Gold Coast and later to Brisbane with work. You’ll hear more on that later this afternoon…

It was in 2001, while living in Brisbane, that Amy got a call ‘out of the blue’. It was Keith Black. Life had moved on significantly for Keith by that time. He was calling Amy to get some numbers of the tennis crowd. In what turned out to be a very long conversation Keith and Amy shared the stories of their more recent times. The changes and the challenges. Amy, clearly in tune with the state of play, made Keith an offer: call for a chat any time. And that he did… many times. And in late 2001, Keith and Amy began their long-distance relationship until Keith “put his foot down” and moved Amy back to Melbourne in 2002. The Keith and Amy Story had begun in earnest.

Along with Keith, Amy was blessed with the addition of two wonderful human becomings in Keith’s children, Craig and Bridget. Amy felt very fortunate, not having any children of her own, to have met Keith, and in turn, been a step-mum to Craig and Bridget. She is so proud to have been part of their lives and to have watched them grow into wonderful adults. She hopes that a little bit of herself has helped to make them the terrific people that they are today.

In the wider Black family, Amy spoke of Keith’s sister, Danni, having been a great sister-in-law. They had plenty of fun times together, enjoying each other’s company and a firm friendship. Danni’s girls, Lottie and Peita, along with their partners Brett & Muscles are, according to Amy, fantastic. Amy spoke of Peita’s beautiful family and she is so proud of Lottie for going out and getting what she wants in life.

Keith’s brother Samuel and his wife Tina and their three girls hold a very special in Amy’s mind. Keith and Amy baby-sat them often when the girls were little. Amy felt so proud to watch them grow into very lovely girls.

As for Keith’s Dad, Bert and his wife, Heidi… Amy loves them to bits! She loved going up to Albury to visit. They were always so welcoming and she has wonderful memories of meals at the Ski Club Chinese Restaurant! Even after Craig and Bridget grew up, Amy loved to go up there to visit, having great chats and drinking wine.

Keith’s older brother Dean  also holds a special place in Amy’s memory. She remembers going with Keith and Keith’s sister, Danni and surprising Dean  in the USA for his birthday. When the trio were near Dean’s place, Keith phoned Dean acting like he was in Australia and calling to wish him a happy birthday. Ten minutes later Keith, Amy and Danni strolled into the party… Dean was so surprised, as was his brother Steve, who was said to gob-smacked. Samuel and Tina, who had announced their intention to be at the party, were already there and equally surprised by the trio’s arrival.

A wonderful and treasured memory for Amy with the Black family was Danni’s 50th in Phuket. It was wonderful fun and Amy recognises that not many families could go away and have such a great time!

In 2010, Keith and Amy, not wanting to wait for retirement to enjoy the life they wanted to have together, moved to Angelsea. They have a very special love: a love that included partying together, throwing parties: dinner parties, fancy dress parties, parties for no good reason and for plenty of good reasons.

Time spent on Marble Beach, walking their dogs, Henry and Davey, were so precious  to Amy. As time passed, Amy would walk the dogs along Marble Beach and Keith would join them at the local café they loved. Looking over the front beach, they’d have a beer and a wine and talk about life, the universe and everything.

Every day as she would walk along Marble Beach Amy was flooded with a strong sense of gratitude. And in the back of her mind, deep in her sub-conscious Amy knew that ‘something was happening’. It heightened her senses. Her gratitude and appreciation for all that she had in her life, in each moment and in that time and space.

Angelsea was the time Keith and Amy came into their own. Talking together constantly; looking up at stars, hand in hand. Surrounded by visiting family and friends. It was an idyllic time.

It was there, that Keith and Amy made an awesome team. Together, in memory of Amy’s mate, Joe – they launched Angelsea’s first Relay for Life. Meeting many years ago at the Elsternwick Park Tennis Club, Amy loved Joe, telling of his cheekiness, his jolliness – that he was a big, cuddly bear. Joe died at 36 from cancer and it was the loss of Joe in her life that inspired Amy, in partnership with Keith, to make a difference. Whilst having a ball, they raised $93,000 for the cause and were presented with the Relay for Life, ‘Spirit of Relay’ Award for their commitment and drive in creating the event.

There is one other significant part of Amy’s life that has not been fully explored. Amy, at Keith’s prompting, spoke of David King – her first husband. David and Amy worked together at ABC Financial Planning. In 1991, Amy noticed this ‘shy guy’ and they became an item. Despite the ‘shy guy’ moniker David had an unparalleled sense of showmanship when it came to work functions. With only the tiniest bit of Dutch courage and exceptional timing, half way through the night, David was known for taking a run towards the dance floor, dropping to his knees – arms spread wide – and sliding across the dance floor like Fred Astaire on steroids. Now, that memory made Amy smile.

David and Amy were married in April of ’93 and moved to their new home in Whittlesea.

Concurrently studying and working full time was a challenge for David and Amy. And after living with Amy’s parents for seven months at the end of 1998. David and Amy agreed it would be better if they went their separate ways. Keith Jones recalls that at that time, Amy had brought a cat Walter with her when she moved back in. And that when she left, Keith and Alice had a new cat.

After nearly eight enjoyable years together their split was amicable and David would visit Amy in Queensland. David went on to marry again, have kids, enjoy great times at work but tragically, he died suddenly in 2009 when a virus went to his heart. He was only 43.

Whilst Amy was back at home, there was another story, shared by her Dad, Keith. It was a telling tale, which reassured Keith that he would never have to worry about whether Amy could take care of herself. It was Census time. Keith filled in his and Alice’s information and passed the form to Amy for her to complete her own information. Completed, Amy handed the form back to Keith, who duly noted that his daughter’s annual income was roughly $15,000 more per annum than his. They had raised a highly capable daughter who was more than able to take care of herself.