Sometimes, in grief it can be hard to think straight! On the day of a loved one’s funeral that can mean that you don’t remember who attended the funeral to pay their respects. Whether there are a dozen or so people or hundreds of people that appear like a vast sea of faces that you can’t distinguish on the day or remember afterwards, a memorial book can help.
It’s important to understand why memorial books are important for families. And in understanding this importance you will remember to print your name clearly – rather than leaving an unrecognisable signature.
For some people, being able to send thank you cards to those who made themselves available to be a part of the farewell is important. For others, they can see just how broad and deep a loved one’s friendship, social and community connections have spread during their life.
Memorial Books can simply collect a record of names – or you can invite people to record how they know your loved one, when they met or their favourite memory that will be treasured.
Most funeral homes are able to provide a memorial book. You can expect to pay for it as either part of their service fee or as an additional cost. So, whether you want one or not, ask about whether they are included in the service fee or are an additional charge.
For some families, Memorial Books provide a practical place to record people’s names. For others, it is a treasured keepsake – especially when mourners offer their memories or favourtite things about your loved one. Depending on your perspective the standard books available from a funeral director may not fit your deisred look and feel. You might not want to have the funeral director’s branding on the Memorial Book. So keep in mind, what you want a Memorial Book for when you are speaking to your funeral director and making a choice about having a Memorial Book.
You can make your own Memorial Book or find one at speciality stationery stores (but don’t leave it to the last minute – they are not always easy to find one you like or that are readily available. Google “Funeral Memorial Books” or “Memorial Books for Funerals.”
There is no right or wrong about having a Memorial Book or not. Like most aspects and decisions to be made about a funeral it is up to you and your family about what you think is appropriate and what you desire!
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For more information on doing dying and death differently or to start thinking about how to handle a death of a loved one before you are overtaken by grief, organise a conversation with Jacqui today.
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Jacqui Chaplin is a Lifetime & End-of-Life Commemoration Specialist (a funeral celebrant among other things) based in Melbourne, Australia. She loves capturing stories about the nature of life and being human, as well as, celebrating and commemorating well lived lives and lives that have ended. Jacqui has a passion for bringing the conversations that many of us find difficult to think about, let alone speak about, out in the open so we can see how our stories, values and beliefs influence our attitudes.
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